this city is getting smaller by the minute

weird, that feeling. my life is great, actually, and yet, I am slightly unsatisfied. the foul taste of security is creeping up my throat, and I don't like it. I have come to a point where thinking of going for coffee at my coffeehouse is enough, actually going there and having the cup would annoy me. it would be unbearably habitual, and I end up feeling trapped in a movie I have enjoyed, but seen one time too often. I move slowly these days, I have left my bike at home to spend more time walking, not thinking. I am more than ready for new challenges, and I am not sure that I can find them here. the thought of leaving here is rising inside of me, still all scary and huge and threatening, but I cannot ignore it. some change will have to be made. it migth be one small change of thought in my head, or one big step into the unknown. finally. oh, that sounds tempting. I am scared.

at last.